How many people in this room are stoners? Don’t raise your hand, your...– Some guy giving a kickass impromptu speech
This didn’t turn out the way I thought it would at all You blame me but...– Relient K
And we sing: Hooray for the madness, we are better by design, Let’s hope...– Motion City Soundtrack
Dad: Geeze. Should I pour you another drink? You only have two.
Mom: The Dr. Pepper is for when I'm thirsty and the cranberry/vodka is for leisurely drinking.
When my friends say "I remember you liked...."
Tina Fey's prayer for her daughter
First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches. May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty. When the Crystal Meth is offered, May she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer. Guide her, protect her When crossing...
yanilavigne: “EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP IT’S...
I wouldn’t say a single word to them, I would listen to what they have to say....– Marilyn Manson (Referring to the people of Columbine)